i dreamt of you last night.
02.11.2011
i wasn't able to finish this post. to write about good and happy moments which can only happen in a dream hurts; and it still hurts to accept the fact that this is finally happening. sometimes i wish i can easily forgive him and just forget what happened but that would be digging my own grave. i'm still confused now. i experience a wave of different emotions - anger, hurt, sadness, regret, but mostly hurt. and sometimes when the pain is too much, i feel nothing. a numbness that turns me into autopilot mode, going about my everyday routine, an empty smile, but feeling nothing. i look forward to these temporary escapes but more than anything, i look forward to finally being free to dream, be happy and fall in love again.
still, sometimes i wish that even in a little time of the night, you dream of me, too.
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